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Florida, United States
Southern born, Southern reared. It's a quirky place and we are unique folk... These are my people and these are my stories.

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Monday Musings on All Things Southern

My husband and I took a walk with our two pooches the other night. We don't walk too far; one of the dogs has managed to become quite tubby so, for her, the short distance for now is just a start. The other dog simply adores being home and let's you know that while she is excited to be a part of the journey, she'd just as soon be a part of the journey at home. 

So, we took our short walk returned toward our lakeside home. We walked up the long driveway. As we neared the door, just before the front porch, we both bent to release the dogs from their leashes. I noticed a huge grasshopper like I haven't seen in years on one of the floral arrangements decorating the front of the house.

"Look at that grasshopper," I said. "It's huge."  

"That's not a grasshopper," my husband said. "It's a Georgia Thumper."

I smiled. "I haven't heard that term in years. No wonder I didn't remember it." (Plus, I'm just not a work-in-the-yard kinda girl, to be honest with you.)

Now for those of you not from the South, you may be wondering what in the world is a Georgia Thumper?

A Georgia Thumper is, in fact, a grasshopper of the Eastern Lubber variety. They are multi-colored, mostly black with red and yellow added in. The males can get up to 8.0 cms. and the females up to 6.0 cms. They are expressive in their faces ("Get too close and I'll jump all over you!") and their names come from the fact that when they jump, they land with a thump.

Georgia Thumper...now isn't that a cute name? There's even a Southern band called by the moniker. And, it kinda makes you think of the cute little bunny in Bambi.But make no mistake about it. They are deadly. Not to humans, of course, unless one jumps on you and frightens you to death. No.

Ask any Georgia farmer and they'll tell you; these little suckers can pretty much eat a crop up in a day. Seeing one is seeing disaster.

So, now I'm wondering why we Southerners didn't think to call the Georgia Thumper the Georgia Crop Destroyer...or something clever like that. Sigh. I suppose, being the genteel Southerners of way back, we just couldn't do it. Give it a cute name...and maybe it will be our friend.

Uh... no.

Hmmm...now I'm thinking...maybe someone should form a baseball team...call them The Georgia Thumpers.  Instead of doing the tomahawk chop, fans can jump up and down in rhythm.

Thump! Thump! Thump!

I can hear it now...

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